“I am so much better than before.”

I have so many things that I want to achieve in my lifetime, but right now my main focus is weight loss. Well, I won’t say weight loss, there are things that are so much more important to me. I love enjoying life, I enjoy the people I surround myself with, I do not want weight loss to consume my every thought and move, but I do have goals I want to hit. 

I also have a list of 50 things I want to do before I am 25. Maybe that is something I will share on this blog, but for now it’s just for me. 

On that list, there are some weight loss related goals. I would like to be able to get to a point where I could job across the 34th street bridge in Ocean City, NJ. I would like to jog across the Ben Franklin bridge. I would like to finish losing 100 pounds. I want to do so many things. But I think the more realistic things to achieve will be the smaller goals that can ultimately get me to these larger goals in the long run.

During my journey, I would like to:

  • stick to Couch to 5k
  • work out 3 days a week
  • drink much more water
  • lose weight every week
  • hit my second goal (I’m 35 pounds away!)
  • start weight training again, and more often

I keep finding myself with these excuses to not keep going, or to eat something unhealthy, or to skip a workout, when in reality there is absolutely one hundred percent no excuse for it. I want to reach a goal. I want to shop in my favorite stores again, like the Ralph lauren and Gap outlets, I see myself as a certain way, and I’m realizing it’s probably not how the rest of the world sees me. I look at myself in the mirror and I really feel good about the person who is looking back at me now. I didn’t feel that way about myself. But more recently, I have realized that I may see myself as someone who looks good and I may feel good, but other people may not look at me and see the same thing. 

A year ago, I saw pictures of myself from my vacation to Florida and that is what made me kick start this whole process. I was depressed for days because of it. I was disgusted. A similar thing happened last night, where I saw a video of myself backstage at the play I was in and I got so sad all over again. I didn’t know I looked like that because I don’t FEEL like that. I feel so much better than I haven in years. But instead of being depressed about it for days, or weeks, I got in the treadmill and decided to stick with all these goals that I made for myself. That is a huge change in myself that wouldn’t have happened a year ago. I am using it as motivation. 



This is that picture from then, and this is how I look now. I can’t be sad about those things anymore. All I can do is acknowledge it happened and never let it happen again. Maybe even focus less on the scale and more on what I am capable of doing. I am doing to do this. I’m never going back.

I am achieving my goals. 


2 thoughts on ““I am so much better than before.”

  1. You look absolutely amazing!! Keep up the good work. When times are rough the before pictures can really push you through. Please check out my blog, I just recently began it and I am looking for some support. 🙂

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