The (Wo)man in The Mirror

My friend Jamie and I got talking last night about self image. The conversation was inspired by a photo I had taken of myself while I was shopping at a store earlier in the day with a little help from my friend, the hard cider. MIND YOU, I have not been able to shop in this store for ages due to the fact that I haven’t fit into any sizes from there but now an XL is baggy. go me!

Here is some more background.

I was taking pictures of potential shirts I was going to buy and sending them to my boyfriend for a “yay” or “nay” and one of them made me think to myself “Wow, this shirt looks really good, I have come so far in the last two years. I really have lost weight.” Resulting in me purchasing said shirt.

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Then I got to thinking…. is this only the way I see myself, or have I ACTUALLY lost weight? Maybe I was just having a good day, who knows. I have no idea how other people see me and I can’t see myself other than in a reflection so it is hard to know how I look in the eyes of someone else.

It’s sad actually that I actually have gotten to the point where I question myself for actually feeling GOOD about the way I look. I mean, I still think I look good in that picture but I am still concerned that maybe it isn’t a true representation of how I am since I have never seen myself in person. I like to think it is, though.

Has anyone else ever felt this way? I know I am not perfect and I have a long way when it comes to weight loss but I deserve to feel good about myself NOW since I have changed a lot over the years. I am still stuck worrying about how other people see me and that holds me back which isn’t how it should be.

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